Friday, after being lazy for a good couple of hours, I got myself off the couch and went to a Weight Watchers meeting. Yup. Friday I rejoined Weight Watchers... Where me and my 50-year old BFFs had a Weight Watchers party complete with
To be quite honest, I was pretty excited. Mainly I was excited to start something new and have a fresh start.
Let me rephrase that, I was excited until I stepped on the scale. Was I surprised with what I saw? Not necessarily. Was I terrified by what I saw? Absolutely. Friday morning I stepped on the scale and saw the highest number I ever have. I reached an all time high of 175 pounds, which is a lot on my 5'3 frame. I wanted to cry and run out the door right there.
Luckily the receptionist was probably the sweetest woman in Minnesota. She helped me pull myself together and directed me to the ridiculously full meeting room. I spaced out for most of the meeting. Luckily, I knew most of the information that the leader talked about since all I could think about was how I ever got to this point... How I would talk about this on my blog... How I could possibly get to my goal weight in 2011.
The following two days I was in denial. I pretended that I wasn't fat. I pretended I wasn't on Weight Watchers. I pretended that I could binge eat without consequences. I pretended and it sucked.
Two days later, Mr. Krech and I visited a church in our area that an old friend is a youth pastor at. Obviously, we were
The words to this song spoke so clearly to me that day:
"Into the darkness you shine
Out of the ashes we rise
There’s no one like you
None like You...
And if Our God is for us, then who could ever stop us
And if our God is with us, then what can stand against"
It's not out of the ordinary for me to cry during worship, but on Sunday I wept. It's so amazing to be reaffirmed of the awesome power of Our God, Jehovah. The one who saves us, heals us, loves us, desires us. God brought me to this place for a reason. He gave me this blog for a reason. He gave me a passion for 101 things for a reason. He gave me the tools I need to be the best I can, to serve Him the best I can... and that kicks the butt of any dumb 175 pounds.
I am overwhelmed.
I am broken.
I am blessed.